Welcome. This is where you can listen to all the episodes of Hornet Heaven so far.
We suggest you use headphones, especially if you’re sitting in the Upper Graham Taylor stand. We wouldn’t want you to wake anybody.
We also recommend listening to the episodes in order. If you don’t, we may have to ask Quique Sanchez Flores back – to get you better organised.
The episodes are between 12 and 45 minutes long, so you might want to make a cup of tea first. (Or Bovril, for the full sensory experience of going back to past matches.)
We hope you enjoy the stories. If you do, please let other Watford fans know – and spread the Hornet love.
SERIES 1, EPISODE 1 – THE TURNAROUND
In 2014/5, a Watford fan passes away mid-match and arrives in Hornet Heaven. At the moment of his passing, Watford are losing 0-2. He simply can’t see why Hornet Heaven is supposed be a place of eternal bliss. (33 minutes)
SERIES 1, EPISODE 2 – WE WAS ROBBED
In 2015/6, a theft in Hornet Heaven means the residents can’t go to any of the old matches – except for the two most miserable seasons in the club’s history. The thief must be found. (37 minutes)
SERIES 1, EPISODE 3 – WE’VE GOT LLOYDINHO
In 2015/6, when club stalwart Lloyd Doyley’s contract comes to an end, the residents of Hornet Heaven do what they can to persuade him not to play for another club. (17 minutes)
SERIES 1, EPISODE 4 – ACCEPTABLE IN THE 80s
In 1980/1, the bliss of Hornet Heaven is disturbed when the latest arrival turns out to be a football hooligan. (33 minutes)
SERIES 2, EPISODE 1 – THE FAMILY CLUB
At the end 2015/6, a Hornet Heaven resident tries to prevent the spread of an upsetting rumour that Quique Sanchez Flores will be leaving Watford. (44 minutes)
SERIES 2, EPISODE 2 – LADS UNITED
In 2016/7, the arrival of two 20-something lads causes social unrest in Hornet Heaven. Can the older residents change their ways? (38 minutes)
SERIES 2, EPISODE 3 – THE GREAT ESCAPE
In 1990/1, with Watford marooned in the relegation zone, a Hornet Heaven resident starts a campaign to oust club chairman Jack Petchey. (36 minutes)
SERIES 2, EPISODE 4 – WE SHALL NOT BE MOVED
In 2015/6, a season ticket holder has died from indignation at being forced to move 12 seats along the Upper Graham Taylor Stand. Will he calm down in Hornet Heaven? (41 minutes)
SERIES 3, EPISODE 1 – THE GREAT MAN IS GONE
With Graham Taylor no longer around, and new people running the club, the spirit and values of the Watford family come under threat. (37 minutes)
SERIES 3, EPISODE 2 – DECONSTRUCTING HARRY
In late December 2016, the antics of Watford’s mascot – Harry The Hornet – create an impact in Hornet Heaven. (23 minutes)
SERIES 3, EPISODE 3 – UP FOR THE CUP
In January 2017, residents of Hornet Heaven take steps to restore the lost magic of the FA Cup. (14 minutes)
SERIES 3, EPISODE 4 – NOT QUITE MANAGING
From 2012 to 2015, a former Watford manager is adamant that the club won’t get promoted to the Premier League if they persist with appointing Head Coaches instead of managers. (36 minutes)
SERIES 4, EPISODE 1 – BORING BORING WATFORD
In April 2017, Watford’s football under Walter Mazzarri is so dull that it makes the club’s founder question whether he wants to carry on being a Watford fan for eternity. (27 minutes)
SERIES 4, EPISODE 2 – GOING BACKWARDS
In April 2017, a new arrival feels so strongly about the club’s lack of progress under Walter Mazzarri that she doesn’t want to enter Hornet Heaven. (38 minutes)
SERIES 4, EPISODE 3 – A WORLD WITHOUT BEAUTY
In May 2017, a former Watford manager finds the football so unattractive under Walter Mazzarri that he wants to quit Hornet Heaven. (35 minutes)
SERIES 4, EPISODE 4 – ONE MAN ALONE
In May 2017, a fan goes against popular opinion and refuses to blame Walter Mazzarri for Watford’s problems. (53 minutes)
SERIES 5, EPISODE 1 – THE TRIBUTE
In summer 2017, Hornet Heaven stages a match in tribute to Watford’s greatest ever manager – but it doesn’t turn out as intended. (60 minutes)
SERIES 5, EPISODE 2 – THE PLASTIC
In August 2017, a glory-hunter is discovered in Hornet Heaven. A resident tries to get rid of him. (32 minutes)
SERIES 5, EPISODE 3 – NEVER TOO HIGH, NEVER TOO LOW
In September 2017, residents of Hornet Heaven discover a controversial new way to get through the enforced boredom of an international break. (46 minutes)
SERIES 5, EPISODE 4 – DIVIDED LOYALTIES
In September 2017, two former players – who played for other teams as well as Watford – become unsure which club they truly love (32 minutes).
(Thanks to the Watford FC Supporters Trust for their kind permission to use ‘Copa De Ibiza Mescla Especial’ from their 2004 CD ‘Watford ’til I die’.)
SPECIAL OUT-OF-SERIES EPISODES
‘TALES FROM THE VICARAGE’ EPISODE
When the Pozzos acquire the club in 2012/13, Hornet Heaven is upgraded. The changes divide the residents. (This is the original Hornet Heaven story from Tales From The Vicarage Volume 2. The episode is in two parts – 33 minutes and 36 minutes.)
CHRISTMAS SPECIAL 2016
At Christmas 2016, the paradise reserved exclusively for Watford fans is violated by ‘them from up the road’. (48 minutes)
‘HORNET EFFECT’ EPISODE
In 2017, the launch of a new fanzine unsettles Hornet Heaven’s Head of Programmes. (9 minutes)
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CHRISTMAS SPECIAL 2017
At Christmas 2017, a fan from another club’s afterlife paradise wants to become a Watford fan and live in Hornet Heaven. (42 minutes)
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